Although my differences in this regard did not really appear until I was a teenager that is not to say I wasn’t always different.
I was born in 2003 to a middle-class loving family.
When I started school I often had difficulty socializing, was hyperactive, and had difficulty concentrating. As a result, when I was 9 years old I was diagnosed with Asperger syndrome and ADHD. I developed a reputation as a source of humour and it took me a while to realize I was being used by my peers.
When I became a teenager my dark antisocial traits began to appear as since I was 14. I have had these sadistic fantasies to rape and murder women and to become a serial killer. I rather enjoyed these thoughts and felt no empathy towards my supposed victim. These thoughts led to me committing several weapons offenses although I never carried out any attacks. I was always prone to intense fits of frustration and hostility.
As for my social life I never had any friends or relationships and was distant from my parents and sister and sincerely told others I would be fine if my family was murdered.
Back to my story as impulsive and reckless as I have always been. I revealed my fantasies to someone else who informed School when I was 16. I was subsequently diagnosed with conduct disorder. For the last two years, I have undergone therapy to manage my thoughts and have completed my a levels. I am about to study criminology at university so I can utilize my interest for the good so I don’t get in trouble.
I can’t change the fact that I am devoid of empathy, or feelings for others but I can always control my actions and can get what I want without breaking the law.
This story has been submitted anonymously via the form on our website that allows people to share their experiences. Psychopathyis.org cannot verify the accuracy of the submitted content.